LISA

PHOTO BY RANDY BACON

LISA

“Hope Means…”

In June 2011, my 3 children and I fled an abusive home life. Anger in our home was frequent and ranged from emotional to physical abuse. I couldn’t fix it, I couldn’t stop it. Many threats of suicide often followed if we didn’t respond to his demands quickly enough. DFS was called, my family started seeing things, and I could no longer “hide our crazy.” Starting over in a shelter was challenging and the mental fog of abuse slowly revealed a broken family that needed a lot of healing.

Over the next several months we endured further abuse as we sought our freedom. I was sexually assaulted, stalked, and the threats escalated. Our family dog did not survive. Eventually the abuser was sent to prison for crimes against our family. BUT it wasn’t the end. It was the beginning of a new life.

My plan was to simply survive. God’s plan was to not just survive, but to thrive. Though my faith was stretched, it would only grow stronger. I eventually fell in love with a man that would lead our family as both a loving husband and a father. My two older children changed their last names and moved on with their lives and their healing. My youngest was eventually adopted by my husband. We all healed from the wounds and scars that domestic violence left behind. Changed, yes, but alas we were free.

If you are someone who is experiencing domestic violence, please know this is not your fault! You don’t deserve this. You and your kids are worth it. You are valuable. You deserve to be loved, not beat down emotionally or physically. They don’t own you! Reach out for help. Develop a safety plan to leave. You have a new life free of abuse ahead of you. If you stay, nothing will change. You can’t change him.

Hope means there is a way out. Hope means I will be ok. Hope means I can breathe. Hope means I can find peace. Hope means I don’t have to stay stuck. Hope means I can choose to leave.